You’re not alone. We’ve all been there. When you try to be as witty and hilarious as possible in the hopes of trying to make friends after leaving the safety of the college environment. I have literally considered chasing other runners in the hopes that they will want to be my friend. Don’t worry, I didn’t. But, at the time, it felt necessary. Making friends is hard. Here are a few thoughts that run through my head as I try to meet people these days.
Where are they?
After years of being surrounded by tons of people my age I had a hard time adjusting to reality where there wasn’t a pool of people waiting to become my friend. It turns out when you move away from your college town you have to put forth effort to find people year age with similar interests.
Why do I feel like an outsider?
Okay so I found someone my age and we get along really well, now what? She’s lived here for a while and has a bunch of friends, not to mention family, that live nearby. She doesn’t need me, but I need her. How do I refrain from coming across as a needy outsider? What happens when they share inside jokes?
Why can’t I think of anything to say?
When I meet someone who seems to have friend potential alarm bells go off in my head. POTENTIAL FRIEND ALERT! I usually get so excited my brain stops working and I forget how to make conversation. That’s when I fail. Who wants to be friends with a mute person? Or a boring one?
Did I really just say that?
When words do come out of my mouth I often times find myself wanting to immediately take them back. No one wants to hear about my socks. As soon as I say it I’m wondering if there’s any way they didn’t hear me or if they could have gone temporarily deaf to the sound of my voice. Unfortunately that has never been the case. Turns out an awkward giggle doesn’t help the situation.
If you’re awkward and hopeless like me this post may really hit home for you. If you’re a natural at making friends, feel free to teach my your ways. But to everyone out there searching for new friends, don’t be afraid to reach out first you never know how awesome someone is until you meet them.