I have an apology problem. I apologize for everything. If you were to bump into me I would apologize. I apologize when I hit people at derby practice…where you are supposed to hit people. Once I even apologized to a mannequin I ran into at a store and then when I realized it was a mannequin and didn’t need to be apologized to, I apologized again.
If you think I’m ridiculous, that’s okay. I do too. If you understand where I’m coming from, know you are not alone. I need to stop. Much like my double apology to the mannequin in the middle of Rue 21 a good number of my apologies are unnecessary.
“Stop apologizing!”Have you ever heard those words before? I have. So many times. you’d think I would learn. I apologize because I don’t want to offend anyone, bother anyone or get in anyone’s one. I also apologize because I’m awkward and I use apologies as a shield socially.
I’ve been on the other side of the apology as well. When someone apologizes for something out of their control or that is not their fault I feel bad. Especially if they continue to apologize. But I quickly forget this as soon as I become the apologizer.
An article from Psychology Today makes some really good points about excessive apologizing and offers some alternatives. If you have the time, it’s worth the read.
I never really thought that apologizing all the time might undermine an actually apology or that saying thank you more often instead would have more positive results. It’s time that I embrace my imperfections.
You know what, sometimes it’s not my fault. Sometimes I need to say no. Sometimes I don’t know the answer and sometimes accidents happen. I’m going to cut myself a little slack and, if you have my problem, you should too. We all should.