The Emotions of Moving

Setting aside completely all the anxiety and frustration that goes into finding your new home whether it be an rental or purchase, there are a ton of emotions that come into play when you move. It starts when you begin packing the boxes and stays with you at least until your new residence begins to feel like home.

Now I would like to point out I did NOT help move any of the my things this time. I had to be out of time on moving day and my boyfriend’s parents and a few of their friends stepped up like little magical moving fairies. I will be forever grateful. However, even with the help I still experienced all the fantastic emotions of moving. Let me elaborate.

Excitement

After a year of my absent landlord and old green bathroom bathroom I was absolutely stoked to be able to wave goodbye to all issues I was dealing with and start new. I have a new space to decorate, set up and make my own. Change can be fun and inspiring. Plus, having a sink that was made after 1960 is a plus.

Dread

Packing sucks. I have so much stuff and it becomes super evident as I packed it all. Then I had to take my bed and my shelves apart. Then there’s the cleaning. So much cleaning. Not to mention moving all of the boxes and furniture. Granted, I didn’t have to move anything this time but I know the feeling of dread that comes over you when you see how many boxes there are or if you’ve been moving things for awhile and there is still more. There’s always more! I don’t want to shovel in the winter and I won’t want to mow the lawn. What was I thinking? I don’t want to adult!

Anger

Could I honestly have any more crap? I get so mad at myself for all the crap I own every time I move. It’s too much. My new closets are smaller then my old ones so I need to organize things differently which makes me mad. And I’m guaranteed to let out a curse word or two if I stub my toe on one of the millions of boxes I’m trying to organize. Is there ever an end to the unpacking? Will this ever all be organized? Never again! I will live here forever!

Joy

Look how cute my new place is! Check out the sun porch! Have you seen the water pressure in the shower? Hell yeah! When things started to click into place I could not have been happier. All the doors lock, there is a yard and I don’t have to live in my old apartment anymore. Yay!

Sadness

I was excited to leave my old apartment. I couldn’t wait. But there was still that moment of sadness when I left my keys behind and shut the door. Change can be inspiring but it can also be tough. I feel old as I start the next chapter of my life. I’m also scared. Did I make the right decision? What if there are issues with the new place? What if?!

Hope

Change can be tough, but it’s all going to be okay. It’s exciting to moive into my first house even if I am renting. Now I can finally get my first dog! There is added responsibility but also it’s great to learn while some of the responsibility is still the landlord’s. I can do this. I can be a grown up. Watch me!

Did I miss any emtions? I probably did. Anxiety is another emotion I will feel consistently until all the unpacking is done and everything is settled. I’m sure there is more.¬†I’m ready to get off this roller coaster of emotion. The new place is 99% put together and I cannot wait until it’s done.

Usually it’s exciting to think about having my own house someday, but for now I don’t really want to think about it. That will be one hell of a roller coaster. For now I will enjoy my yard and search for a puppy.

Things Can Change

It’s been one heck of a crazy year. So many things have changed for me. Fortunately, most of those changes are for the good. As twentysomethings we’re at that time in our life where big decisions are made, change is commonplace and we’re all navigating vastly different courses.

Around this time last year I was terrified. Not only was I changing jobs less than one year after accepting the first position of my career, but one of the factors in play for this decision was my boyfriend. Now, please don’t miss understand me, I was smart with this decision. I made sure to find a job in my field, that I wanted and where I got a raise. ¬†However, Mike’s location did play a factor and it was scary to include that in my decision making process.

The first two months were a HUGE transition period. First, adjusting to living under someone else’s roof which Mike’s parents generously offered me while I was apartment hunting and then setting up the new place while acclimating to a new type of position and worrying that I had made a mistake and I would find myself alone and heartbroken in my boyfriend’s hometown.

Fortunately, here I am a year later and my heart and my life are still in tact. There have been a few bumps and curves along the way, but that is to be expected. Despite the frozen tundra that enveloped the apartment when the heat went out and the ant invasion of 2017, I am moving soon to a pet friendly house where I can finally own my first puppy.

Over the last year I ran my first half marathon, bought my first set of brand new tires, attended a Packer playoff game and became a derby girl. I built my first 3D puzzle, published another poem and stayed in my first all-inclusive resort. I even cleaned out my closet.

Looking back over the last 365 days, it feels more like a lifetime. I am proud of all that I have accomplished and to have learned from the mistakes I made. The move was scary, but ultimately the right decision for me. Thank god! Things can change and that’s okay. Embrace the changes, attack the challenges and live life to the fullest.

To everyone that has Feels Good at First stuck in their head, here you go: